"These trials are only to test your faith, to show that it is strong and pure. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold - and your faith is far more precious to God than mere gold. So if your faith remains strong after being tried by fiery trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world."
1 Peter 1:7
I had one of the worst days of my life. I was 'burned' today, badly. It hurt with pain I really don't know how to describe. I had to cry out to my God, and pour my mixed up feelings at His feet. I didn't worry about reverence, I didn't even worry about how I came into His presence. My professor today warned us that we ought to come into God's presence fearfully aware that we could be punished. If that were true, the earth would have swallowed me a long time ago. But I know the truth. There is no fear of punishment, because Jesus drank the entire cup of my Father's wrath. I know my Father's voice. I know how frail and weak I am, and how much I fail Him. I had no faith to offer Him in my defense, but I think He heard my cry and pleading for some. It hit me. He's REAL. The Spirit really does use the Word of God, but why does it take my most desperate hour for me to realize it? Think about it. Our faith is more precious to Him than gold or value. I'm being purified, and somehow, before I derailed, He reminded me tonight that though the pain is real, it is accomplishing for more than I could dream. He really is a good God. And, I love Him. Do you? May this be a reminder to you that we are His dear children, and He loves us with unfailing love, especially when our circumstances and the evil one leads us to believe otherwise. I hope the Enemy can read. :)
1 comment:
Tim,
I am sad to hear that you had such a rough day this week. I am further saddened that a man of God did not do his best to lighten the burden but instead loaded it up with more fear. I think that I can imagine what professor, and what class, for it sounds familiar.
Remember, my friend, what you have written on your post. Even when you don't feel that it is true, it remains the truth. I wonder sometimes if the Enemy doesn't always lie to us - maybe he just tells us the truth out of its proper context, so that the truth is used as an instrument of falsehood (is that vague enough for you?).
Let me illustrate - think of a tree in a garden, surrounded by lots of other trees, a naked man and woman, and a snake. (I won't blame you for picturing them with clothes on - might help - smile).
"God knows that in the day you eat of it you will be like God, knowing good and evil..." The text tells us later that that is EXACTLY what happened (see 3:22). God DID know what would happen if they ate, and he DID want to prevent it from happening. The snake told them the TRUTH!
But he presented the truth to them in a convoluted way, casting doubt on His character and His motives. He didn't tell the truth for the purpose of giving them comfort in the goodness of God in preventing them from experiencing evil - he made it seem that God was actually holding out something good from them.
So, the truth (you'll be like God, knowing good and evil) is used in the service of evil, and mankind is damned.
Here's where I'm going with this: a professor, eager to defend the portrait of God presented in the Old Testament, presents a truth about God - that it is a terrifying thing to fall into the hands of the living God (Hebrews 10:31), and uses it in a way that is divorced from our context today (in the shadow of the NT and our redefined relationship with God in Christ).
Such truth, though well-intentioned, is serving evil by causing men and women to push away from God, which is the last thing that God intends for humanity.
It is true that the self-confident, the self-assured, the arrogant, the proud, the religious need to fear the living God, and they need to fear being in His righteous presence. In Hebrews 10, the ones who are terrified to fall into the hands of the living God are those who are willing to turn away from their faith to pursue the path of least resistance. Those who ignore God or think Him small and stupid have much to fear, for our God is a consuming fire.
But, to the contrite, humble, and broken, God is a rock and a refuge. His Son is a great High Priest who is able to help us in our weaknesses, who commands us to come boldly before His throne to seek grace and strength for our time of need.
No doubt there is a certain fear and awe that would happen when suddenly encountered with God's brightness and majesty, and that fear is appropriate. But when God has revealed to us that He longs for us to run up into his lap as his children, is it less godly for us to cry out to him like weak, wounded children? Ought we to long for the OT days when men "knew their proper place" and didn't even brave the mountain, for fear that they would die?
Since when is Israel's relationship with God ever shown to be better than the relationship that God has established with the Church through Christ?
So, my friend, all of that hot air to say that I am saddened that truth was used in the service of evil and that it hurt you today. But, when faced with a fiery dart, you raised the shield of faith, my friend - you clung to what is true, and you won the battle, though you won it with scars and pain.
I celebrate you, and your warrior spirit, that is not ashamed to fall before your God and be broken and expect grace, not condemnation. As King Arthur once said, "No man fears to kneel before the God he trusts."
When we kneel before the Offended Father, we wait for the hands of blessing because our Older Brother, Yeshua, has borne our punishment. There is nothing left but delight and joy.
May you feel my hand of blessing on your head today, Tim. As an older brother, I charge you to keep moving on the path that God has laid out for you. But more importantly, I long for you to feel God's hand of blessing (it is sweeter because it is undeserved) on your head today.
The Enemy's back is broken. One day, his knee will bow - and "the God of peace will soon crush Satan under your feet" (Rom. 16:20). You will have a part in his punishment for the damage that he has caused to God's world. You will share in the victory and triumph of our Warrior-King, Jesus Christ.
And even death will be swallowed up in victory.
Your brother, and fellow warrior,
Toby
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